Teresa Giudice: Bound For Orange is the New Black Prison!

Teresa Giudice has been sentenced to serve her 15-month prison term at the Danbury, Conn., location where the series Orange is the New Black is based.

Teresa Giudice Going to Court

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star was fired by her crisis manager earlier this week, allegedly for trying to orchestrate a move to this very spot.

Wendy Feldman ended her contract with her high profile client on Monday, for not following due process in her representations to the Bureau of Prisons.

Conflicting reports said that she tried to secure a place in a halfway house, which would have allowed her to work and visit home during the weekend.

In any case, a judge shot down her halfway house request, saying that her timing for such applications was all wrong and sending her off to Danbury.

Guidice, who was sentenced to 15 months in prison for fraud and conspiracy with her husband Joe Giudice (who got 41 months) is free until January 5.

The couple will serve their sentences separately so one is with their daughters, who you’re familiar with if you watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey online.

Orange is the New Black, which is based on a memoir by Piper Kerman inspired by the year she served at the facility, has become a hit for Netflix.

Guidice will not be the only celebrity resident Danbury has seen in recent months. On Friday, October 3, singer Lauryn Hill was released from the facility.

Expect a lot more headlines from there once Teresa checks in. Here are 11 reasons, in GIF form, why her fellow inmates had best be on notice:

Table Flipping Fiend


Teresa Giudice is not gonna take any crap. Her table-flipping reputation will precede her in prison, thanks to The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 1.

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Kim Kardashian at 13 Years Old Brags "I’m the Dopest!" Watch the Hilarious Video Now!

We all know that Kim Kardashian has a knack for cashing in on her fame, but as a newly unearthed video of the reality at her eighth grade graduation proves she’s been in love with the camera since long before anyone was paying her for it.

In celebration of Kim’s 34th birthday, E! released the above footage of a 13-year-old Kim hogging the spotlight and bragging that she’s “the dopest and the ropest,” whatever that means.

We’d make fun of her for being annoying, but she’s no more obnoxious than your average hyped-up tween. In fact, we’re kind of impressed by her energy.

What happened to that personality, Kim?! Maybe there is some truth to those rumors that Kanye turned Kim into a robot.

Naturally, Kris Jenner makes a cameo in the clip – awkwardly trying to get down with the cool kids while Bruce stands by looking bored and annoyed. Some things never change.

Obviously, Kim’s changed considerably over the past 20 years, but some particular facial differences in this video have re-opened the debate about whether or not Kim has had plastic surgery

We may never know for sure, but one thing is for certain – little North West will either love this video or be horrified by it when she’s 13 herself. 

Kim Kardashian Cleavage Picture


This is a photo of Kim Kardashian’s cleavage. Not that we needed to tell you that, of course. We’re sure you already knew.

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Kim Kardashian Vows: My Daughter Will Get a Job!

As anyone who has seen the Kim Kardashian sex tape knows, Kim Kardashian has worked hard for her money.

Or, to be more precise, she’s been worked over by a hard Ray J for her money. But still. Either way.

Along these lines, the reality star tells London Evening Standard’s ES magazine that her daughter won’t be raised with a figurative silver spoon in her mouth.

Kim Kardashian Magazine Cover

Kim, after all, came from wealth, yet still has to earn her own way for awhile.

“We didn’t get anything [from my parents], we had to get a job if we wanted it,” Kim explains. “So I was working in a clothing store and I would save and save.”

She cites $400 Prada shoes that she saved a whole year to buy, along with a Dolce & Gabbana dress she “really wanted” in high school.

So even though North West allegedly already owns a gold toilet and $1 million worth of jewelry, Kim makes it very clear: her child will get a job once she’s of age.

“She will have to work for what she wants,” Kardashian says simply.

In what industry?

“She loves fashion. Maybe she’ll be a designer,” Kim muses. “Who knows? It’s too early to tell.”

Well, yeah. She’s not even 18 months old.

Kardashian could also picture her child getting into music, sharing the following story with the magazine:

“The best is when Kanye’s recording in the home and we’re in Mexico or whatever. And the music will be upstairs and she’ll hear it, and it’s really loud and you’d think it would disturb her, but I just kind of rock her to it, and she’ll just pass out.”

Anyone else find the image of North West falling asleep to “Niggas in Paris” to be absolutely hilarious?

Morning, Kim and Nori!


It’s Kim Kardashian and daughter Nori! The former posted this photo online with a simple caption: Good morning.

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Kim Kardashian: North West ‘will have to work for what she wants’

kim ES Mag

This ^^ is the new cover of The Standard’s ES Magazine. That’s Kim Kardashian. It’s a terrible cover, I know, and that oversaturated red makes my eyes hurt. I have good quotes from the magazine, but first: where in the world are Kim and Kanye? As it turns out, Kanye planned a “surprise getaway” for Kim’s 34th birthday. He took her to Maui! That’s actually really sweet. I wonder if North was invited though? Hm. Here’s how Kanye celebrated Kim’s b-day (it was on Tuesday) on Twitter:

Call me a Yeezington apologist, but I think he genuinely loves her. I know, I know. I’m a big softie. I’m not saying he wouldn’t yell at her if she was in a wheelchair, I’m just saying… he seems to adore her. Anyway, as for those ES Magazine quotes… Kim talked about how North wasn’t going to be super-spoiled and she would grow up working for what she wants:

Kim Kardashian says her daughter North will have to find a job and pay her own way when she is older — just like she did. The reality TV star, who is married to rapper Kanye West, says despite her family’s wealth she worked at a clothes shop when she was at school. Kardashian, 34, said she used to save up her wages for treats and would like her daughter to “work for what she wants” too.

In an interview with ES Magazine, to be published in full tomorrow, she said: “I saved up for this Dolce & Gabbana dress I really wanted, or like in high school these Prada shoes that my parents wouldn’t buy me. And I remember they were $400, and I had to save for the entire year to get them … We didn’t get anything [from her parents], we had to get a job if we wanted it. So I was working in a clothing store and I would save and save.”

She added: “I was saying that earlier to my friends, ‘I wonder what [North’s] first job is gonna be’. And they were like, ‘What? She’s gonna have a job?’ and I was like, ‘Are you kidding me? Of course she is’. She will have to work for what she wants.”

North, who is 16 months old, has already started modelling for Vogue and CR Fashion Book. Last month she was on the front row of Paris Fashion Week with her parents. Asked what she thought North might do when she is older, Kardashian replied: “I don’t know. She loves fashion. Maybe she’ll be a designer. Who knows? It’s too early to tell.”

Kardashian said North also likes her father’s music, which she said she uses to rock her to sleep. She added: “The best is when Kanye’s recording in the home and we’re in Mexico or whatever. And the music will be upstairs and she’ll hear it, and it’s really loud and you’d think it would disturb her, but I just kind of rock her to it, and she’ll just pass out.”

[From The Standard]

My Kardashian-to-English Translator interprets Kim’s remarks as “Lucifer’s Homegirl is going to pimp out the little one as soon as possible.” While I think Kim’s version of “work” is very different than mine, yours and everyone else’s, in a larger sense… yeah, I guess we could describe her as a self-made woman. I do think that much of Kardashian Empire was built by Lucifer’s Homegirl though, not Kim. Kim wouldn’t be where she is now without the pimp hand guiding her every move. Will Nori be the same?

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Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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kim ES Mag

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Hank Baskett: Still Wearing Wedding Ring! Back Together With Kendra?

Don’t stick a fork in Hank Baskett and Kendra Wilkinson’s marriage quite yet, no matter how grim the situation looks when you watch Kendra on Top. Why?

Dude was spotted still wearing his wedding ring! This week!

Of course, he could just be delusional, Lamar Odom style, in thinking he still has a chance after some of the stuff he pulled over the past six months.

However, the former NFL star was spotted grocery shopping at Whole Foods with a Baskett (sorry) so full it could feed a family of four, so there’s that.

He’s probably not kicked out of the house, in other words.

Kendra Wilkinson and her husband have been through the wringer this year, thanks to his sordid sexual tryst with Ava London while K-Dubs was pregnant.

With the drama from earlier this year now playing out on WeTV’s Kendra On Top, we can put to rest any chatter that this might be all a giant charade.

If it were, Wilkinson deserves an Emmy after this week.

Wilkinson freaks out in a sneak peek from this week’s show, grasping a glass trophy dedicated to Hank for being a great parent and person not long ago.

“To the world’s greatest husband and father … that’s gone,” she declares on Kendra on Top Season 3 Episode 6, telling Hank he’s not wanted in her house.

“F–k you I’ll smash this over your head!”

Despite his pleas to be heard, Baskett ends up getting an earful and kicked to the curb, although she has yet to file for divorce or kick him out for good.

To Kendra’s credit, she’s not throwing away her marriage without really trying to work on things, but can they possibly get past this and move on happily?

Hank wearing his ring at Whole Foods is great, but he still messed around with a woman with a penis. That could be a deal breaker in the end for Kendra.

Kendra and 2 Hanks


There was a time when Kendra and Hank looked to be a very happy couple. This photo was snapped in 2012.

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Taylor Swift Unveils Complete Album Track List

So… is it October 27 yet?

A few days prior to the release of her new studio album, Taylor Swift has taken to Instagram and pulled back the curtain on the CD’s entire track list.

Taylor Swift Track List

The 24-year old sensation announced her first all-pop album in August with the lead single “Shake It Off” and its accompanying music video. Both became enormous successes.

Since then, Taylor has come out with another relationship anthem (about Harry Styles?) titled “Out of the Woods,” along with her ode to The Big Apple, “Welcome to New York.”

As you can see above, the latter will be the first single heard on “1989.”

Fans can pre-order the new album on iTunes right now and then listen to it the moment the clock strikes midnight on Monday, October 27.

In anticipation and in promotion, Swift has been making the media rounds of late.

She’s appeared on talk show and given magazine interviews and lashed out at those sexist critics who come down on her for writing about failed attempts at love.

She’s also held private listening parties at her NYC apartment because Taylor Swift is totally cool and awesome and we love her. We can’t wait for the new album.

Taylor Swift Twerking


Taylor Swift Twerking and grinding against Taylor Swift in an amazing GIF mashup of Taylor Swift photos.

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17 Halloween Costumes Women Have Managed to Make Sexy

It’s an October tradition, even more so than the San Francisco Giants appearing in the World Series or Kim Kardashian celebrating a birthday:

Women going out for Halloween with very little clothing on.

Slutty Corn


You’ll wanna take your time while picking these kernels from between your teeth!

Indeed, across this great country, females have turned October into National Dress However You Want Without Being Called a Skank Day. 

We’ve already seen sexy Frozen Halloween costumes get released in honor of this celebration… but those outfits have nothing on the pieces of attire featured in this gallery.

There’s a skanky clown costume. And a skanky slice of pizza costume. Really.

Wanna dress like a skanky crayon? If so … weird. But good news: you can!

We kid you not, there’s even a skanky Oompa Loompa costume.

What does it look like? Grit your teeth and find out now!

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Jon Gosselin Reportedly Leaves Trashed Home Strewn With Garbage, Abandoned Kitten After Eviction

Jon Gosselin’s former landlord is speaking out in the aftermath of his recent eviction, and suffice it to say, she does not paint a positive picture of the man.

Getting Smoked

Linda Eways, who evicted Jon Gosselin from her house in Wernersville, Pa., says she paid a surprise visit to the property after she thought he’d moved out.

And he had … for the most part. He certainly left his mark on the place.

Not only did the father of eight leave the house trashed, strewn with garbage and debris with walls and doors damaged from Jon’s dog, he left something behind:

A kitten.

Yes, the landlord says she discovered a tiny cat abandoned there. Eways says she called Jon to ask about the kitten and he admitted as much.

Well, specifically, he said his ex-girlfriend Liz Jannetta (the one he appeared on Couples Therapy with, apparently without a lot of success) left it there.

According to earlier reports, Jon’s ex moved out in September, so the kitty was there for at least a few weeks with just Jon if our calendar is correct.

Eways says the sight of the poor kitten “broke [her] heart” so she decided to adopt it. In that sense, at least the animal has a loving home now.

But wow, Jon. We know times are tough, and being married to Kate Gosselin must have caused him major psychological damage … but come ON.

What would his kids think? What does anyone with a beating hard think?

Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian


The marriage between Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian lasted 72 days. Pretty much every second of it took place on reality TV.

Star reached out to Jon, who claims what the landlord says “isn’t completely true,” but wouldn’t elaborate. So that totally makes us view him more favorably.

Meanwhile, speaking of Kate, she’s having a yard sale soon and says that a portion of the proceeds will be donated to her local animal rescue league.

We can’t believe we’re saying this, but #TeamKate. Too bad the animal rescue group find a way to relocate Jon from himself. Clearly he needs it.

Also he needs a home BTW. Being broke and getting evicted and all.

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Leah Messer Spends $600 a Week on Pills, Drug Dealer Claims

Rumors that Leah Messer is addicted to prescription drugs seem to surface every few weeks, and the newly-remarried mother of three has vehemently denied them each time.

Now, however, a drug dealer who claims to be Leah’s personal connection says he has all the details about the Teem Mom star’s dangerous pill problem.

Leah Dawn Messer Calvert Photo

“She’s picked up 30 to 40 pills at a time from me,” the anonymous supplier tells Radar Online. He adds that since she’s become famous, she sometimes employs a middle man to carry out the transaction.

However, he also says she frequently gets desperate and picks up the pills herself.

The dealer claims Leah frequently spends several hundred dollars a week on pills, and her own friends and family have discussed her addiction publicly:

“I’ve seen Leah pop a handful of pills, chew them like they were candy, and swallow them,” says one relative who asked to remain anonymous.

Leah justifies her pill-popping with complaints of a bad back, but the source says “it’s actually the pain from withdrawal that bothers her, not her back. She can’t do a day without opiates.”

Insiders claim that Leah’s habit may soon cost her her children and husband. Last week, Jeremy Calvert accused Leah of cheating in a series of vicious tweets.

Leah denied cheating, and the couple seems to have overcome that particular dispute, but friends of Calvert’s claim he’s since decided to leave his wife.

“He doesn’t have an exact timeline, but he’s done,” says the source.

Watch Teen Mom online at TV Fanatic for more drama and horrendous decisions.

Leah Messer and Daughter


Leah Messer and one of her three daughters share a tender moment.

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Bruce Jenner Reacts to Kris Jenner Heartbreak: Who Cares?!?

According to various accounts, Bruce Jenner is now dating Ronda Kamihira, the best friend of his ex-wife, Kris Jenner.

And even though Kris is allegedly torn apart over this development, crying herself to sleep every night because neither party even gave her the romantic heads-up, an insider says Bruce has only one reaction Kris’ waterworks:

SO WHAT?!?

Bruce Jenner Image

Kris is devastated,” a source tells People. “This was her best friend of 20 years, [but] Bruce isn’t really concerned with her feelings about it.

Jenner and Kamihira were first spotted out together at an Elton John concert in Los Angeles on October 4, just a few weeks after he and Kris filed for divorce.

Kris Jenner called in to Ryan Seacrest’s radio show this week and played it all cool, saying she didn’t know anything about Bruce’s personal life, but that she wished him the best.

“I don’t care who he goes out with,” she also said on the Today Show on Monday. “He doesn’t check in with me and give me a play-by-play!”

But People says otherwise.

“She is so sad, completely heartbroken and just truly shocked,” the magazine writes, partly because Kamihira’s children grew up with Kendall and Kylie Jenner, and the children “have been best friends.”

So, might Kris date again soon in order to get back at her ex-husband and best pal?

Jenner “doesn’t have the time,” says the source, adding, “she’s not ready.”

Bruce and Kris Jenner in 2012


Awww, remember when? Bruce and Kris Jenner act all silly circa 2012 in this photo. They have since split up.

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